caracaleo

Just one of those days…List of Things to Think About in Life

Posted on: May 25, 2012

You know when you feel numb? I’m in this limbo right now: that limbo of where I just want to be alone or I just want someone to hold me for a while an not let go. So I’m just sort of stuck right now. I’m happy, It’s not that. I just am learning to be an adult and deal with things. It sucks sometimes.

I have two very important things to get done this summer and I haven’t really been working on either of them. Suffice it to say…the outcome does not look good.

I’m usually smiling and happy..but right now..right now I’m in limbo.

I don’t want a relationship and I know the kind of person who I will someday want a relationship with. I’m not going to settle. I’m not going to force things that aren’t there. I’m not going to settle. I’m not. I’m done. I’m tired of dating, and I don’t care I’m not going to wait around. I’m going to live my life and if love comes my way and its real and honest and right and works. great…

What I am disappointed in is people. I thought I had better friends, and friends I could really count on. I’ve always tried to be there for my friends. You know? I feel like I’m the one always calling to hang out with people. Sometimes I feel like I’m close to someone and then idk. I really try to be there for everyone I care about..but I’m starting to see that it’s not worth it.

I’m putting in so much effort into friendships and its wasted. They don’t care.

But what really sucks right now is this weekend. Three things have really popped up this week that have been really hard for me, and there is some stuff I don’t wanna deal with this weekend. It’s like I want someone to hold me you know. Where I feel safe, and their skin is soft, and they smell good. But right now I don’t have that person. but i know ts worth the wait. i dream of the day there is someone truly in love with me.

Life is really simple. We over-analyze over think. If a guy likes you he will kiss you. If a guy says he doesn’t like you then he doesn’t end of story. I have to grow up. We all do.

I look at what is in front of me. And all I want is that someone…but I’m not searching for them. When I’m ready (which isn’t right now) and I meet the right person etc. then …I know what I want and need in relationships and I’m not settling..but I dont want one right now..

 

but sometimes, don’t you just want someone who thinks your amazing, someone who can’t help but be around you, don’t you just want someone who thinks about you nonstop?

 

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